Mr. Emotion

The sheer ridiculousness of the human mind has been the topic this evening. Of course, the choice to read through WordPress followed sites led me to the writing here tonight. By choice, I’m unloading some harbored thoughts. It helps to get things out once in a while. Since no one else is here, and since the keyboard is, I am going to share my thoughts … Continue reading Mr. Emotion

The Fallible Form We Know

The last few days have been a challenge, but isn’t that what this life is anyway? Long story very short, the build up of intolerance towards a very unnecessary habit of another led to me going off on them. I had enough of an individual making fun of every person we are both acquainted with. The habit–one exactly like my own in the past–was effecting … Continue reading The Fallible Form We Know

Take Me Away

When reading many of the writings of others, a common thread often appears: An escape is necessary. There has been so many roads along this personal journey. The times now behind have brought me to this very moment, and as reflection can be now be observed, I recall such disarray in my youthful ignorance. It was a bad, bad deal. I just didn’t know, as … Continue reading Take Me Away

Pardoned

Bitterness was always something that I was accustomed to, but thanks to other bitter people, I’m now realizing why that was. In the recent weeks exchanges with others has tested my patience on several levels. Practicing the pause: a moment of consciously comprehending what is involved within an exchange and not reacting / responding while emotion is welling, has not been easy. However, the constant … Continue reading Pardoned

Consumption

It was a humbling experience in recent days that had me stepping back in order to reassess a few major factors within myself. The ordered blood tests from my doctor were due before the upcoming visit with her next week. I arrived at the lab early Wednesday and they withdrew the desired amount. I received the test results a few hours later and did not … Continue reading Consumption

A Narrative

The shift in consciousness is revealing many things, but what I have noticed the most is the onset of stories I tell myself throughout the day. I catch myself doing it several times a day: the self-talk that leads me down the fictional paths of imagination. A thought enters my mind, I take off in a habitual manner and form a narrative that is really … Continue reading A Narrative

Narrow Is The Path

Being enthusiastic about a different way of thinking is good for me, but man, it is not good for others it seems. I’ve tried to introduce the teachings of Eckhart Tolle to a few individuals in recent weeks. In very subtle ways, I’ve done my best to suggest that a few simple practices he has taught me are a sure way to begin a process … Continue reading Narrow Is The Path

In Attendance

It goes against the very grain of me to live in the Now. How often it has been throughout my life to go off into a time that only exists within my head; in memories of another now. The times when I had or went without. Times when things were not as good, or maybe better. Forgetting and most times ignoring those past times as … Continue reading In Attendance

My Personal Observed Digest

Life is actually designed to challenge us; to work against us. It is not designed to work with us. We experience a bad situation (financial, relational, etc.), resolve or overcome it, and another one soon arises. When we expect life to work in our favor we experience pain and unhappiness. It’s a delusion to think that the world will do good for us if we … Continue reading My Personal Observed Digest

As It Is

Observation is a beautiful tool that I have been using as far back as I can remember. The world was so awesome when I was a child. I remember spending much of my time alone while exploring the safe neighborhood on the outskirts of the city. My grandparent’s home was on a street serving in part of the framing of a friendly community. All neighbors … Continue reading As It Is

Quiddity

The beginning of a transformative way of observation has been leeching. It is something that has latched onto my thinking mind and is slowly becoming the new normal. I took a long bike ride through the city yesterday evening. The five o’clock hour marked the beginning of a nine day vacation from the employer. It is always a freeing experience to ride for me, as … Continue reading Quiddity

In Between Spaces

There are small gaps in between these words and sentences, much like the spaces in between the thoughts behind them. When I began to write this morning, it occurred to me that my mind has been going through many changes throughout a somewhat short period of time. Several weeks has been an awakening of sorts. I’ve really noticed just how my little mind constantly speaks, … Continue reading In Between Spaces

It Cannot Be Unseen

Drifting off into a memory from the childhood–a simple memory that seems to stick with me throughout the years–took me by surprise Friday evening. I was probably no more than three at the time. It was definitely a clear, sunny day with plenty of lush greenery; spring or summer in the early Eighties. I witnessed a young man with a boombox on his shoulder, with … Continue reading It Cannot Be Unseen

Form

A collection of who I am is what I saw as I looked over many of the writings on the site. My blog fist began because of a desire to project my unique experiences into the world with hopes that someone, somewhere, would see their life in a different way. The ability to think about our personal lives–what we experience and how we process the … Continue reading Form

We Think

The UPS man and I had a conversation yesterday about the negative people of the world. There are two individuals of whom we are both acquainted with that absolutely will suck the life from you, if you allow it. He had made a comment to me at one point that I really had trouble accepting. He said that he enjoys talking to me, and that … Continue reading We Think

Restricts

Today has been a strange one. My family and I had a good evening around the fire in our backyard last night. Our oldest boy, only fifteen, has an understanding of society that is beyond anything my wife or I had known at his age. He and I had a discussion about the control that people have come to accept, and even love. The discussion … Continue reading Restricts

Social Distortion

I’m not sure why so many people these days are taking things to extremes, such as their religious beliefs, political views and opinions. I am not very happy with social media. It seems as though I only hold onto it for the sake of my family. It’s a nice way to stay connected to people who, unfortunately in most cases, have forgotten how to knock … Continue reading Social Distortion

More Distractions

This quiet home on a Saturday morning is a marvelous thing. My wife was on her way home from her shift at the hospital while the kids were away at their grandparent’s place. I had just sat down to the first sip of coffee as I listened to the low hums of my surroundings. Birds were mostly silent as they hunkered in their hidings. It … Continue reading More Distractions

Considered

Perspective is so distorted by an individual’s fear, I am finding. For a great majority of my own life, fear played a huge part. It was always there. It had its say no matter what aspect or time period of my youth had manifested. These times are remembered with great vividness. Fortunately, there is a contrast now that looks nothing like those old days. I … Continue reading Considered

Fraidy Cat

As I watch the world pass by, I wonder why people are so afraid of themselves? I’ve been hung up on this “pride” thing, lately. After recently writing posts relating to the pride we all possess, I have been going over the topic in my head all week. I keep coming back to this question of why most people appear to be insecure and afraid … Continue reading Fraidy Cat

In A Day

Maybe I’m not as paranoid as others feel the need to be? Do they need to feel paranoia? I sometimes wonder if a vast majority of the world thrives upon this delusion while traveling forward into the unknown; taking each setback and inevitable trial as a “told you so“ when the downfall does unfold. Is the world conditioned to fear? Is the fear only fueled … Continue reading In A Day

Emptied

Silence is best at times. I haven’t been writing as much. The life outside of a small screen has had so much to show me. Recent times have brought about a calling to see just how quiet I can become. Is it what they call, “zen?” I’d say so. My wife and I just took a very long drive through three states, admiring the natural … Continue reading Emptied

Theo And Benny

Take a few minutes… https://www.cbsnews.com/news/utah-boy-halloween-skeleton-best-friend/ It is a nice story in these current times. I believe Theo has his priorities in perfect order; a two year old boy has more sense than a lot of the adults that are roaming the planet right now. I did my usual surf of the newsfeed this morning after opening my search engine. The nearing presidency is taking up … Continue reading Theo And Benny

Bad News And Blunder

The past few days have been comical. Although some of the content of my recent days has not been anything to laugh at, the unbelievable works of people involved in that content has me shaking my head. I have (very lightly) been following the political banter and I am amazed of just how ridiculous a fly on someone’s head has become. The, not even funny … Continue reading Bad News And Blunder

The Rushed Descent

I watched the beautiful sun setting yesterday evening, and something occurred to me. It’s been a rough season for me personally. Outside of the pandemic and all of its trace consequences, I’ve had quite a bit of distress of my own. This virus crap is minimal within my worries. I believe death is not only inevitable but it is also something that we cannot focus … Continue reading The Rushed Descent

Tuned

I am sitting this morning and noticing the aches within my body. It’s early, and the day ahead will bring much more of the reason for my physical soreness. Being a laborer five days a week, as well as usually wearing myself out at least one of the days of the weekend, has a way of physically breaking me down. This morning, the majority of … Continue reading Tuned

Now

So much sadness fills the hearts of people. No time for the fruits of His Spirit. You know, love, joy, peace, and so on. The opposing is rather forceful, it seems. The demons we possess–both past, present, and anticipated future–contaminate the light, pulling us into those places that no longer exist… Just in our heads. The heart aligns with those places. The opposing is familiar. … Continue reading Now

Bitching:

There’s really no other word for it. A woman in front of me is sticking her neck out and complaining to a stranger about her new car having a defect of some sort, as the man behind me is cussing his way through complaining about the line we are all standing in. We are at the BMV. There are a number of people—over twenty of … Continue reading Bitching:

Change

Before light, my mother would wake me on school days. After the alarm wouldn’t manage to budge me from my coma, due to the evening of drugs and alcohol the night before, her persistent voice would fill my room. I recall the usual routine of sitting at the sofa with the candy dish that I used as an ashtray, while flicking my ashes from the … Continue reading Change

Harassments

Out of all the things there are to focus on, people gladly choose the hell of the world. A man whom I have worked with for many years is really showing his true self lately. Every single workday I can hear his troubled voice, backed with his boisterous theories, spreading the negative to others. Twenty, thirty, or possibly even more minutes are spent on his … Continue reading Harassments

The Value Of Sunny Days

Checking the weather forecast is certainly something I take for granted. To see beautiful, sunny days with given percentage chances, on the news or an app, is a marvelous thing! When I see little symbols that show a sun, or a sun with a few clouds surrounding it, my life changes!! Just being lighthearted. In all seriousness, I truly do love a sunny day in … Continue reading The Value Of Sunny Days

Monday

There used to be a few people in my life that would do everything within their power to bring others around them down. Unbeknownst, these individuals had a poor grip on their own reality. With every miserable breath they took, the misery was exhaled. It was so sad to watch. What was even worse was the willingness I had to allow their sadness to rub … Continue reading Monday

Polychrome

Created are the atrocities Inventions of the mind Beyond our control Within check at times Practices can manage Chemicals may heed Chemistry is a riddle Understanding is the need Past will perform Vivid stage play in memory Present screen play in monochrome Flushed by what used to be Instability is the writing on their paper See how it will go… Take two, then come back … Continue reading Polychrome

The Clenching

How truly hard it is to genuinely be a kind man. I work with a mix of personalities, mostly men. Being a full-time worker, I end up spending more time with them than I do my own family. It is sometimes very hard to not focus upon errors that occur. Our jobs are intricate, and they are expected to be conducted in a harmonious manor … Continue reading The Clenching

Returning

The body cannot keep up with the mind. Heart races when anxiety thinks it is time. Topics of old peel scabs that took years to find. We count facial lines.   Time took away the agility we took for granted. The youth and avant-garde–once graciously handed. Aged like the wine, yesterday, now demanded. Discomforts–mine, yours–leave us enchanted.   Shouldn’t we dwell upon such things as … Continue reading Returning

Fell Off The Wagon…Again

I’ve been practicing an old habit in recent weeks. Habits. They form. After trying something initially, and unknown desire drives our diversely-structured brains to feed upon it. To continue. Some of them are beneficial, while others are not so good. In my particular case, a habit that I once held closely with a firm grip, slowly reared its destructive head within the last few weeks. … Continue reading Fell Off The Wagon…Again

Observing

How other people view us, really, isn’t relevant. It seems as though the last several years have brought a focus that wasn’t as prominent as it had been in years past. Popularity of social media, the lax commutations we have adapted, such as texting, tweeting and so on (anything one can identify as means), has really changed society in negative ways. With it all, a … Continue reading Observing

Hinder House

Locked away, the man sat with only his thoughts. He ate from the cans he’d packed away, counting down–each bite, each number from the label. The water he’d rationed spilled to the floor in his fit of anger. A candle–dimming, much like his soul–burned away in the corner of his space…. Alone. He spoke to the angels that would visit him. They spoke in ways … Continue reading Hinder House

Exposed

What I’ve seen within the past few weeks is the true colors of our race. Some are flaunting what they have acquired, while others give freely, with grace.   Many are panicked, pushy and unfair. A few are courteous, and they genuinely care. Troves are ungrateful, even though the money still comes… They never notice the unemployed–their daughters and sons.   Chaos created by a … Continue reading Exposed

Rise

I think I’ll look for peace today. Not worrying about the panic and the current, stressful way. I think I’ll enjoy the songs of the birds outside my door, and see the beauty in someone that I’ve never seen before. Maybe I’ll catch the sunrise as I’m heading towards the east– capturing the calm that, for a time, had sadly ceased. I think I’ll look … Continue reading Rise