So Little Known

I ran across this song in February of 2019. It was just a few days after my father had passed. The song had so much emotion, as I also had, that was expressed through Thom’s unbelievably unique talent. My father was a mystery to me, but what little I did get to experience while knowing him was a mix of how this song makes me … Continue reading So Little Known

Harassments

Out of all the things there are to focus on, people gladly choose the hell of the world. A man whom I have worked with for many years is really showing his true self lately. Every single workday I can hear his troubled voice, backed with his boisterous theories, spreading the negative to others. Twenty, thirty, or possibly even more minutes are spent on his … Continue reading Harassments

Revisiting

An old writing of mine, revisited.   Collected Fragments Of My Time– August, 2018 The memories of my grandfather and his work shed. There was an addition off to the side of a one car garage that was made into his work area. The small space was a place where he frequently spent his time. As a young boy, I would venture out to watch … Continue reading Revisiting

My God…

Pilate asked, “What is truth?” Jesus replied with, “I am.” Yet, they need more than that…  Lending God a hand.   Move over, God, men have found more to add. They interpret your truth, negating what you had. It’s way more complicated than a simple faith in you. So many educated scholars, telling others what to do.   Oh, God, so many men have robbed … Continue reading My God…

Hinder House

Locked away, the man sat with only his thoughts. He ate from the cans he’d packed away, counting down–each bite, each number from the label. The water he’d rationed spilled to the floor in his fit of anger. A candle–dimming, much like his soul–burned away in the corner of his space…. Alone. He spoke to the angels that would visit him. They spoke in ways … Continue reading Hinder House

Exposed

What I’ve seen within the past few weeks is the true colors of our race. Some are flaunting what they have acquired, while others give freely, with grace.   Many are panicked, pushy and unfair. A few are courteous, and they genuinely care. Troves are ungrateful, even though the money still comes… They never notice the unemployed–their daughters and sons.   Chaos created by a … Continue reading Exposed

NOOOO!!!!

Please, add some depression to our depression! By all means, make the voice of the media your new obsession! Open your mouth as quickly as they! Turn off your own thoughts and listen to what they say! Think on their fearmongering words while running for cover! Suffer even more as the anxieties hover! Tell myself and others so we, too, are distraught! Destroy the peace … Continue reading NOOOO!!!!

The Feed

Fear is waiting in the shadows, and it patiently watches you. It takes its seat a few chairs down. You go on without a clue. Closely, it observes your routine. It studies your schedule. It has an endless time to plan ahead, never losing its cool. It uses tools that you feed upon, like the devices you willingly watch. It uses the writings upon your … Continue reading The Feed

Nothing

Thrown into their madness. The child never had a chance. He wasn’t given an option. Victim of circumstance. No happiness, early on. No place to be a kid. He was forced to learn too early by watching what they did. Was it just a part of life –this newness he was seeing– to hit another person; to scare and scream when meeting? Each time, he … Continue reading Nothing

On Fear Street

The haunted houses I used to visit were some of the scariest places on earth. The homes were filled with the same things that you could find within the usual home: pictures, appliances, furniture. The parts of the familiar when it pertains to daily necessity. Pretty lively places, overall. At certain times, though, the demons would manifest. The fiend would take on many forms. A … Continue reading On Fear Street

Eventual Sands

His stones were getting heavy. He placed them on the ground. A little relief from the intensity. He stood and studied what was found.   He took a seat next to them. He rummaged through the stones of time. Some were smooth and full of character. Others were roughened by his crime. One was stained with blood of an enemy. Another, riddled with diamond trace. … Continue reading Eventual Sands

Go. Be. Do.

I watched a baby Koala embrace a stuffed animal, and it made me fall into a deep, spirit-filled prayer. The video was a short clip of a little Koala that had lost its mother shortly before, and someone had brought a fake stuffed Koala to it. It seemed to be weeping, as it had its paw over its eyes, appearing to be grieving from its … Continue reading Go. Be. Do.

I Left It Somewhere Along The Way

I’m a little bit less joyous these days, and I sometimes wonder why. Things kind of lost their luster — not as bright through this same eye. I told myself, ‘It’s just a season.’ How long can a season be cold? It’s not a frigid season, but, this needless chill gets old. I long for a time when laughter and smiles were abundantly there for … Continue reading I Left It Somewhere Along The Way

Awaiting

As a silent observer, I often view my world from the outside. In other words, I take the time to examine myself — the practicalities, emotions, responses, etc. Being in tune with me. This morning, I have been observing a recurring, personal fact. This post may be considered a bit morbid for some, but I tend to write from my heart. I often think about … Continue reading Awaiting

She And He Almighty

I figured she would start another argument today, instead, she demanded someone definitely should pay! She is miserable, you see, and she needs others to always know that somehow, someone else is the reason she is low. It’s a constant pattern within this woman who never fails to see! The blinded know-it-all, telling all how they should be. He’s a man of honor, at least, … Continue reading She And He Almighty

Heavy Ways

Heavy is the weight of the trials; the load that is carried throughout the long walk of miles. Heavy is the stressful life we find; those demands and strangling hands of a love lost, never left behind. Heavy is the decision one wishes could have been different; the choice in a moment they are now sickened by, as it fell short of efficient. Heavy is … Continue reading Heavy Ways

Their Futile Rumination

When things are grey, much like the skies over our foreseen days of cabin fever, we look into ourselves. The walls close in. We begin to think of things that aren’t true: Do they care? Do I matter? Why me? Am I as good as I tell myself?   The grey impedes. Shortened days and wearisome nights. Patience restrained. Diving deeper into the abyss of … Continue reading Their Futile Rumination

Broken Crowns

It seems as if most Christians are always trying to correct someone. This morning, I am just going to share my thoughts and feelings on the matter. Take what you will from it. Like myself, many people do not like to be told what they should do. We have to remember: we are not the other person. We have not seen through their eyes, been … Continue reading Broken Crowns

My Lord, My Friend

Rest assured when facing a trial that God is with you even while the people aren’t there when you need them most The one’s who’d promised would rather host their own importance Entertaining ego They never call or stop in They have reasons you know But God is there always and He knows all the pain that you’ve carried along as you’ve received their disdain … Continue reading My Lord, My Friend

‘Check, Please.’

As I was sitting in on a sermon at the church my family and I were attending several years ago, which just happened to be right before I was deciding to become what the institutionalized church refers to as, “a member”, I was finished with the nourishment provided. After a several-course meal of the spiritual foods I had never tasted before, throughout a run of … Continue reading ‘Check, Please.’

Stay Inside

The chilling wind carrying rains of darkness, beating upon the world. It brings the memories of mornings, without; a time when life was much like the calamity outside — no light for sight. No cover for the damp. No insulate for the chilling condition. What if the day brings promising light with the same calamities? Like those days of old.   “Ambient radiance?” No. Just … Continue reading Stay Inside

Bring It To The Storehouse

Watch out for the polished preacher The one with the salesman smile He is keen and knows Scripture and will make it worth while to get you inside his palace He’ll promise to shepherd you in truth But he will add to his scrupulous teaching a common and accepted spoof not found anywhere in the Bible One crafted by men and their pride A denominational … Continue reading Bring It To The Storehouse

Decadence

God knows the heart of all, unlike the men who look down from the platform and quickly judge them.   Not many should be leaders in the churches of the day, for not many speak the truth… Do you watch what they say? They place themselves higher with their knowledge and wins, while never acknowledging that we all have our sins.   Why should we … Continue reading Decadence

Soapbox Sabotage

Why do His children fool themselves by believing the obvious lies? Pulling wool over their own faces; blinding prideful eyes. Point to Scripture — and if they don’t like — they talk and talk some more. They talk around the sin at hand, while tiptoeing for the door. If in error, or if doctrine corrected, the proud man makes excuse. If you back it up … Continue reading Soapbox Sabotage

The Resonance Of His Voice

My dad has been gone for all of these days and I am seeing him now in many new ways I see my father in reflections and behind the closed doors I see him on the streets and in empty drawers He drove by me one day but it wasn’t him Perhaps he waved at me with my thoughts at whim I heard his voice … Continue reading The Resonance Of His Voice

Ashes To Ashes

Saturday night alone Just me and the thoughts at hand Reading the writings of my father His pen, his marks, scribbled firmly onto his yellow sheet I sit and stare into the fire The mysteries pass before its light My dad: no longer like the wood that fuels the flame like the thoughts that passed away with him like the pen that scribbled his voice … Continue reading Ashes To Ashes

Remnants

When my father died, my family and I went to his place and took what we wanted. There were many things that were selected by myself and my half brother and sister. We took a look around our father’s place and brought the things that we deemed as valuable back to our own homes. I took all of my dad’s tools. Within the collection, there … Continue reading Remnants

In The End, Most Of This Doesn’t Matter

I watched my grandfather, who lived to be 93 years of age, lie in bed after his wife had passed. He was dealing with a lot of sorrow after she had moved on to her eternal life. He would just stay in bed most of the time. I had a few limited interactions with him within those few months between my grandmother’s and his passing. … Continue reading In The End, Most Of This Doesn’t Matter

What We Choose To See

The anticipation of spring; the long awaited event that is greatly appreciated after a cold winter. The blooming of the new, full of the bold colors of God’s choosing. My wife requested that we surround the house with flowers this year. We had moved into a different home a little over a year ago and the landscape was pretty bare. It needed a lot of … Continue reading What We Choose To See

Our Thorns

Some have no comprehension of a truly troubled life. Sure, everyone has troubles, but some are so overwhelmed by those little things that cut, that nothing is found to be a remedy. Sometimes, even one’s faith is not enough. Let’s be honest. There are things in everyone’s life, and specifically, within the Christian life, that are continuously tearing away at the individual. A, “thorn in … Continue reading Our Thorns

The Pain That Heals

This past Saturday night, my beloved dog of ten years died. He was probably one of the best dogs in the world. Of course, any dog owner would probably say the same about their own dog. He was a huge blessing to me, especially when I was all alone at an all-time low within my life. His comfort, warmth, playful personality and willingness to always … Continue reading The Pain That Heals

We Cry Out

I have a dog that is dying. He is losing weight rapidly, will not eat and only drinks occasionally. His medications aren’t working. Last night, he cried for hours. A hard fall off of our outdoor steps left him with an injured spine several weeks ago, and now his whole body is deteriorating. The doctor does not know what to do at this point. Blood … Continue reading We Cry Out

A Force To Be Reckoned With

I had a friend many years ago who could walk into a room and quiet everyone with his domineering ways. The very presence of him: unbelievably large physique, dark complexion, dark clothing and the attitude comparable to that of a Viking, were very good reasons to move aside as he would enter. Everyone, and I mean everyone, felt intimidated within his company. I witnessed some … Continue reading A Force To Be Reckoned With

We Fail To Trust The Walk Upon Our Waters

22 Immediately he made the disciples get into the boat and go before him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. 23 And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, 24 but the boat by this time was a long way from the land, beaten by the … Continue reading We Fail To Trust The Walk Upon Our Waters

‘Now That I Am Beaten To A Pulp, …’

I can see why some would not want to be a Christian, and I totally understand what Gandhi meant when he said, “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” I believe Gandhi had a good point, and I am choosing to focus on it lately. Unfortunately, I tend to focus on the negative when I … Continue reading ‘Now That I Am Beaten To A Pulp, …’

In Between

There once was a time when I had to wait for the results of a blood test that I had done. I was ordered by my doctor to give blood in order to have it examined. The testing would show whether or not I had, what would be, a very life-changing disease. It was also possible that I could have had more than one disease. … Continue reading In Between

The Lies We Tell

Sometimes I sit and wonder if I am okay with the lies that I tell myself. Am I okay with being unhealthy after my doctor tells me that my diet is destroying me? Am I okay with the little sin that I continue to give in to? Am I seriously okay with the people who continue to hurt me? Am I okay with the complacency? … Continue reading The Lies We Tell

Stop Watching The Clock

The waiting game. So often we await. I’m currently waiting for a person to change. They refuse to take the steps needed to improve. I really love this person. Today, I have to set the necessary boundaries with this person. I’ve prayed about it, meditated on the ways to go about it, and I fully trust that the Lord will fix the mess. If you … Continue reading Stop Watching The Clock

Father Knows Best

I do wish that I could write about my father in a way that praises him for being a more loving one. My dad was a very private man as I was growing up. He never wanted to spend his time with me. He would get me set up with a project, only after my mother had suggested it, and then go about his business. … Continue reading Father Knows Best

Presently Within

If you have been reading my posts lately, you have seen the writings about the therapy sessions I have been attending with a loved one. We had another session this past Thursday. I would like to share some key lessons we both have learned within our time together. For anonymity purposes, I will only refer to the person as my loved one. My loved one … Continue reading Presently Within

Sometimes, Life Just Sucks!

Our own toxicity is sometimes what keeps us from moving forward. I had a brief talk with a co-worker yesterday about what we choose to fill our lives with, and how those things affect us. The conversation started out by me saying something that was interpreted as negative, and it was. I was very tired yesterday when first arriving. Unable to accurately recognize emotions in … Continue reading Sometimes, Life Just Sucks!

Shine On Buddy…

Twelve years ago today we buried a brother, and who I consider to be the best friend I’ve ever had in this life. Besides Christ of course. It was easier than the past years, but talking with him is continually missed. The guy was rough, but he was also what I needed at the time in order to begin a walk with the Lord. This … Continue reading Shine On Buddy…

Personal Struggles Are Sometimes Revealing, And Refining

I sometimes hate weekends. My wife has a third-shift job that she works on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. My kids go to their grandparent’s house for the weekend most of the time. Saturday is a day of rest for me, and let me tell you, it is a much needed time for me. I have a very physical job, so rest is something that I … Continue reading Personal Struggles Are Sometimes Revealing, And Refining

A Day Just Like Any Other

I’ll never forget where I was when I had heard that a plane had hit one of the Twin Towers. It was a Tuesday morning on September 11, 2001. I was outside loading a delivery truck for the company I had been working for. The radio was on as I was loading items in the cab of the truck. The actual sound of the impact … Continue reading A Day Just Like Any Other

Patiently Waiting For A Brighter Day

Patience. I can truly say that I haven’t really had much of it throughout my life. Impatience was always a big part of who I was. Within the strands of my life, there have been many lessons that have led me to a better understanding of patience. I’m thinking deeply about it this morning. I believe the early childhood trauma played a part in my … Continue reading Patiently Waiting For A Brighter Day

Questions From A Searching Saved Soul

Why is it that I cannot find a church that speaks His truth? Only some truths, with a man-made spin? Why is it that the Shepherds are paid? Why is it that Jesus never stood in front of a podium, told people to give ten percent, never had His members… wait, “members?” Where did He say to become a member of a group? Did we … Continue reading Questions From A Searching Saved Soul

A Friend For Life

Sometimes others just need a buddy. I have a friend who is quite a bit older than me. We have known each other for well over thirty years. When I was very young, my buddy was already an adult. He was always walking around the neighborhood, and never wandered far from his home. An accident had left him with multiple injuries to his brain and … Continue reading A Friend For Life

Our Deadly Combination

I lived within a dysfunctional family. I was once engaged to a woman who had a mother with many problems. Her mom would stay with us for extended periods of time. She was addicted to opiates, and had a plastic pill container full of the daily doses of her medications. Way too many to count. I remember the Tupperware containers full of her prescriptions that … Continue reading Our Deadly Combination