Mr. Emotion

The sheer ridiculousness of the human mind has been the topic this evening. Of course, the choice to read through WordPress followed sites led me to the writing here tonight. By choice, I’m unloading some harbored thoughts. It helps to get things out once in a while. Since no one else is here, and since the keyboard is, I am going to share my thoughts … Continue reading Mr. Emotion

The Fallible Form We Know

The last few days have been a challenge, but isn’t that what this life is anyway? Long story very short, the build up of intolerance towards a very unnecessary habit of another led to me going off on them. I had enough of an individual making fun of every person we are both acquainted with. The habit–one exactly like my own in the past–was effecting … Continue reading The Fallible Form We Know

No Guarantee

There is a blogger who likes to conclude his posts with the words, “Something to think about.” It is a religious blog. Each week the posts are sent out into cyber space and arrive, like this one, in front of an audience to be analyzed. The recipients then have the chance to agree, reject, or remain neutral after digesting the writing. The something to think … Continue reading No Guarantee

Lights

It was another arduous work week, but the end of Friday was an enjoyable time out on the many streets within the city. I brought the bike with me and cycled for just shy of two hours. Today, it is being felt. The noticeable healing process has slowed in the current run of my decay, but yet I still find myself being in much better … Continue reading Lights

Fade

A friend is being taken off of life support today. I can’t help but wonder why we cannot forgive the past—both our own mistakes and those of others. The man going away today had so many reasons why my ego wouldn’t allow him to be a little closer in the latter days. I couldn’t handle his substance abuse. Yet, I sit and think about my … Continue reading Fade

Take Me Away

When reading many of the writings of others, a common thread often appears: An escape is necessary. There has been so many roads along this personal journey. The times now behind have brought me to this very moment, and as reflection can be now be observed, I recall such disarray in my youthful ignorance. It was a bad, bad deal. I just didn’t know, as … Continue reading Take Me Away

Energy

I sat this evening with many different energies at work within their spaces, and I realized that we are of that same energy. The science doesn’t matter, but whatever creates our energy surely fills our space with a grandeur that is always in motion. It shall all be enjoyed, indeed. Continue reading Energy

Pardoned

Bitterness was always something that I was accustomed to, but thanks to other bitter people, I’m now realizing why that was. In the recent weeks exchanges with others has tested my patience on several levels. Practicing the pause: a moment of consciously comprehending what is involved within an exchange and not reacting / responding while emotion is welling, has not been easy. However, the constant … Continue reading Pardoned

Your Calm Beneath

In hindsight, the quest for understanding God had really screwed me up. My mother and I had a treacherous conversation the other day. It sometimes ends up being a disaster, and it’s usually my fault. It is difficult for me to listen to a miserable and repetitive cycle of thought patterns that are conveyed in the same series of words nearly every time I meet … Continue reading Your Calm Beneath

Blog That Ego

Who am I to draw attention to a narrative I call, “Mine?” An emphasis I present for someone else to compare to and compete with… A voice within, dying to speak louder and longer than… Maybe a 👍 to stroke the ego! Perhaps an agreement to boost the confidence! Am I the golden one with finger outstretched, pointing proudly, while the three of no blame … Continue reading Blog That Ego

Is The Boy, “Saved?”

Identification seems to be instilled from a young age. At the time of receiving a given name and understanding that we are to be addressed as that name moving forward, we identify ourselves with a title. It was a another long hot week here in the Ohio Valley. Rains late within the week brought cooler temperatures and people out of their air-conditioned places yesterday evening. … Continue reading Is The Boy, “Saved?”

A Narrative

The shift in consciousness is revealing many things, but what I have noticed the most is the onset of stories I tell myself throughout the day. I catch myself doing it several times a day: the self-talk that leads me down the fictional paths of imagination. A thought enters my mind, I take off in a habitual manner and form a narrative that is really … Continue reading A Narrative

Unrest

It’s interesting to notice how most of what we call life is only experienced through the senses. I was studying an old photo of my wife’s extended family on the bookshelf today. The men wear the butterfly collars of the era while the women have the typical hair-dos. In the background, an artificial backyard setting of a home–not theirs–provides a quintessential feel for their captured … Continue reading Unrest

The Enigma Of Being Comfortably Uncertain

There was a truth that presented itself this afternoon on my way home from the workplace. Maybe it was more of a collection of truths? As any reader could probably gather when visiting the blog and especially the last several posts, my focus has shifted to the acknowledgment of just how much I identify myself with mind: the voice that never stops chattering within me. … Continue reading The Enigma Of Being Comfortably Uncertain

In Attendance

It goes against the very grain of me to live in the Now. How often it has been throughout my life to go off into a time that only exists within my head; in memories of another now. The times when I had or went without. Times when things were not as good, or maybe better. Forgetting and most times ignoring those past times as … Continue reading In Attendance

Trustworthiness

I saw the universal truth of every living thing within my recent experiences. There is something outside of my work routine at the place of employment that pulls me into the natural world outdoors. For the last few weeks I have diligently been working on our landscaping. It is satisfying for me to spruce up the flower beds, as well as beneficial when putting out … Continue reading Trustworthiness

Rising

My grandmother and I used to watch a television show called Nature on PBS when I was growing up. A narrator would talk about the animals and ecosystems from around the world, while the cinematic visual stimulations would leave my grandmother and I in awe. “God made that,” I remember her saying. While we focused our attention on the animals or plants being described, we … Continue reading Rising

As It Is

Observation is a beautiful tool that I have been using as far back as I can remember. The world was so awesome when I was a child. I remember spending much of my time alone while exploring the safe neighborhood on the outskirts of the city. My grandparent’s home was on a street serving in part of the framing of a friendly community. All neighbors … Continue reading As It Is

In Between Spaces

There are small gaps in between these words and sentences, much like the spaces in between the thoughts behind them. When I began to write this morning, it occurred to me that my mind has been going through many changes throughout a somewhat short period of time. Several weeks has been an awakening of sorts. I’ve really noticed just how my little mind constantly speaks, … Continue reading In Between Spaces

Inner Stillness Of Its Song

The beautiful birdsongs of morning A stillness in the light The comfort of a peaceful mind after a rest in night An easy Sunday ante meridiem Calm like lake of glass Space between present ponders No future or past Meditation and observation No judgment of events No worry of things to come No passion for what ego resents Too much on my plate come tomorrow … Continue reading Inner Stillness Of Its Song

It Cannot Be Unseen

Drifting off into a memory from the childhood–a simple memory that seems to stick with me throughout the years–took me by surprise Friday evening. I was probably no more than three at the time. It was definitely a clear, sunny day with plenty of lush greenery; spring or summer in the early Eighties. I witnessed a young man with a boombox on his shoulder, with … Continue reading It Cannot Be Unseen

All That’s Left

We sat peacefully in the fragrance of freshly-mown grass… My mother and I are spending more time together since her split with the man that had his priorities. She and I are doing much better since we have learned to accept each other’s differences. I’ve been mowing her lawn once a week since the Spring has sprung. We sat on her back patio and enjoyed … Continue reading All That’s Left

The Greatest Addiction

To free myself of the addiction of overthinking is in the works. I’ve spent some time going over the past few years of posts within this blog of mine in recent weeks. Writing about the experiences I had throughout time seemed to help me process the inner frustrations and insecurities. Being transparent, publicly, served as a therapy to help me identify those issues causing my … Continue reading The Greatest Addiction

A Trace

I sat and thought for a moment about those people in time… I remember meeting up with S—- while walking home from school some year during high school. I maybe had met him only once, but that single time we had shared together had its significance, enough for me to say, ‘What’s up, man?’ We rode in his mother’s car, I do remember. We all … Continue reading A Trace

5:16 a.m.

Never before have I felt this way. When the anxiety has left, the nervousness and tension from thinking about the past or future no longer holds me in its firm grip, and when I know that the only true time I have is this very moment, I am truly, “there.” Yes, I’m there. The question used to be asked as I would go about each … Continue reading 5:16 a.m.

Mind Control

A thought late last night entered my tired mind. It was about a person from my past. The thoughts sort of took over, as I dwelled upon what the person and I had gone through, and how the eventual end of our days together sort of hurt us both. This morning, I found myself still thinking about the person, but just a few minutes ago … Continue reading Mind Control

Evergreen and Pal

The beginning of Spring has a way of motivating me, providing ideal temperatures and tranquility through the gift of sensory. Saturday is my day of rest. Being lazy is the goal. Giving it my all throughout the week and then resting on the seventh day is just something that eventually took hold over the past several years. The routine is pretty standard: My wife brings … Continue reading Evergreen and Pal

Before You

What is sad to see is the things we find; the negative in our worlds viewed through conditioned mind. We are victims or victorious, which ever one we say. Whatever condition we believe has made us this way. We fight the losing battle within ourselves—without end. We look to God when inner-strength is lost— a Creator we can’t comprehend. Praying for relief from the hell … Continue reading Before You

Form

A collection of who I am is what I saw as I looked over many of the writings on the site. My blog fist began because of a desire to project my unique experiences into the world with hopes that someone, somewhere, would see their life in a different way. The ability to think about our personal lives–what we experience and how we process the … Continue reading Form

Brilliance

I heard the tune on Pandora this evening, and it had me thinking about recent weeks. When I was a kid, walking in nature was always one of my favorite things to do. My family, friends and I would often find ourselves in the wooded areas around our area. Camping, fishing, riding our bikes, just walking or sometimes sledding in the hilly trails during winter–we … Continue reading Brilliance

We Think

The UPS man and I had a conversation yesterday about the negative people of the world. There are two individuals of whom we are both acquainted with that absolutely will suck the life from you, if you allow it. He had made a comment to me at one point that I really had trouble accepting. He said that he enjoys talking to me, and that … Continue reading We Think

This Vast Correctional Facility

We seem to have very deep discussions around our fire pit here in Indiana. My father-in-law and I had a discussion last night that briefly touched on how different everyone truly is. Now that I’ve had coffee and more time to think about the little aspects which led to the topic, my morning has been purposely minimal. No social media, no article reading, just silence. … Continue reading This Vast Correctional Facility