Rooted In Being

What good staying away has done! There are many things that I have been straying from, and I couldn’t be more satisfied with where it has led me. For starters, I was spending way too much time within the devices we are all hooked on, like some sort of back alley junkie. Always needing my fix of the mostly phony facade. Looking through the screen … Continue reading Rooted In Being

Beyond Compare

When we display ourselves on our own shelves, what do we suggest? Me statements, I statements… ‘Yes, I must confess! Part of me wants to love you, I really do, but my ways are best. It’s not fair, yeah…I don’t care. Life and people have screwed me! Self absorbed? Well, you know who I’m really for… I am the best.’ When we display ourselves on … Continue reading Beyond Compare

Bad Medicine

Writing is not as therapeutic as it once was. I believe, in many ways, writing is an excellent way to process emotions. Unfortunately, my emotions have had a lot of control (probably due to the fact of being bipolar to a certain degree). I’m beginning to recognize how writing, while dwelling on the topics I choose to write about, more often than not cause me … Continue reading Bad Medicine

A Man—No More Than A Dream

I knocked on my father’s door at the end of the hall last night. I knew that it was his apartment because of the items outside of his door. He didn’t answer at first, but he finally did. As he appeared, his mostly naked body stumbled backward as he let me in. His nose clearly had been broken, his words were slurred, and his eyes … Continue reading A Man—No More Than A Dream

Just A Man

I looked into the eyes of a man in a photo this morning. He is an esteemed leader in a mega-church. Thousands of people love his teachings of the Bible, and they respect his rank of Senior Pastor within the church. “Senior Pastor” is a title that the world has crafted up based on our merit system. Nothing to do with the Bible, but that’s … Continue reading Just A Man

Something To Do

It is intriguing for me to observe the interests of others and to wonder why they do what they do. It’s also important. Being a deep thinker is hereditary, I’m finding. As I grow older, I’m beginning to see just how much of my father is really in here. He would study people (not in a creepy stalking manner, FYI), observing their words, facial expressions … Continue reading Something To Do

God Is With You, So Move On

When my dad was in his fifties, he began a change. These ways were limited to my view, as I was just beginning to visit him again after a three year hiatus. He was no longer a part of the family in any way, as he had separated from my mother and I perpetually. It was not until he and I reunited that I noticed … Continue reading God Is With You, So Move On

Missing Text

Are we all on the same page? It’s obviously a silly question, as no two people are alike. I have been home today and sleeping soundly. Heading to work this morning, I began to feel like my body was weighted down by a crippling heaviness, and it was not being relieved with ample amounts of coffee. After arriving at my job and pushing through for … Continue reading Missing Text

Rebuke

Each day is a new opportunity to quit with the disapproval of myself. I think back to those days when I was the butt of the joke. I had a group of friends who would make me the center of laughs. I allowed it. When we as young teens would get together, smoke pot and drink, the giggles came naturally. We were always high. Everyone … Continue reading Rebuke

So Little Known

I ran across this song in February of 2019. It was just a few days after my father had passed. The song had so much emotion, as I also had, that was expressed through Thom’s unbelievably unique talent. My father was a mystery to me, but what little I did get to experience while knowing him was a mix of how this song makes me … Continue reading So Little Known

Revisiting

An old writing of mine, revisited.   Collected Fragments Of My Time– August, 2018 The memories of my grandfather and his work shed. There was an addition off to the side of a one car garage that was made into his work area. The small space was a place where he frequently spent his time. As a young boy, I would venture out to watch … Continue reading Revisiting

On Fear Street

The haunted houses I used to visit were some of the scariest places on earth. The homes were filled with the same things that you could find within the usual home: pictures, appliances, furniture. The parts of the familiar when it pertains to daily necessity. Pretty lively places, overall. At certain times, though, the demons would manifest. The fiend would take on many forms. A … Continue reading On Fear Street

Inside Out

Everybody hurts. This I know. I’m hurting lately. This face does show. Not entertained. Temper is short. People are annoying. Emotions contort. Tired of religion. Fed up with the Church. I’m looking for Him. Worn out from the search. Routine is redundant. Weather does suck. Sunsets aren’t peaceful. Down on my luck. Real talk this morning. Don’t need your prayer. It helps to write. Don’t … Continue reading Inside Out

My God, The Gods We Make

We don’t make God our god, rather, we make the ideas of Him our god. We make the things that satisfy: feelings, emotions, beliefs, and our fixes for what is craved. The objects. The physical. The lessons learned. We use the gods to depict God, much like the image of Him we see in Cathedrals. Like the stone figure at our graves… We dig through … Continue reading My God, The Gods We Make

Morning Meditations

In the morning, I usually sit at our kitchen island, on a bar stool. Throughout the island are little remnants of our lives: various papers, pencils and pens, bills, keys, wires for devices, magazines, and this laptop that I use to write. Although we have five here, I find myself alone in this early hour. The kids are asleep, one is away. My wife is … Continue reading Morning Meditations

Awaiting

As a silent observer, I often view my world from the outside. In other words, I take the time to examine myself — the practicalities, emotions, responses, etc. Being in tune with me. This morning, I have been observing a recurring, personal fact. This post may be considered a bit morbid for some, but I tend to write from my heart. I often think about … Continue reading Awaiting

Kill The Messenger

I’m tapping out! You win! Go ahead, freely lie to the world! Carry on with your sin! It’s okay, I guess? No longer a problem here. Just remember who told you when consequence draws near. Tell others they’re safe from the game men have conducted while your life falls to pieces due to fools you’ve entrusted. Do you need security? A safety net? A social … Continue reading Kill The Messenger

I’m Losing Faith…

…no, not in the Lord. I’m losing my faith in men as they drum up continuous discord. They all claim, “absolute truth”. Twisted flesh interpreting Word. “Look at my way — ignore your own, for your way is absurd!!” The temple of stone erected, with label and fable within. No room for arguments of meaning, just ranks and imperious men. They leave a lasting impression … Continue reading I’m Losing Faith…

Humbled By Sight

These hands: They are scarred and stained. They carry a number of memories. They’ve held a number of chains, and keys. They defend. They comfort. These feet: They have walked many miles. They have kicked the habits, the enemies to the curb, and they will walk until they cannot anymore. They are holding. This heart: Stressed, yet staunch. Bleeding. Loving through the hatred. Able, and … Continue reading Humbled By Sight